Tunnel Failure Explains "Invisible Johnson"

With the UK General Election now less than 2 weeks away, Eton-educated struggling Tory London Mayor Mr Boris Johnson has been conspicuous by his absence in Conservative campaigning in South East London.

A regular user of the Blackwall Tunnel told us "Mr Johnson is never usually shy of a photo opportunity, however absurd, but my guess is the Tory Party election chiefs are forcing him to keep a low profile as they try not to be associated with Johnson's failures and broken election promises. Mr Johnson's failures to deliver on his election pledges include failing to re-instate the tidal flow at the Blackwall Tunnel, failure to deliver running London Underground trains later on Friday's and Saturdays, failure to keep a promise to keep all London Underground ticket offices manned, his vicious slashing of police numbers in London putting the security of millions at risk", and hitting the low paid hard by increasing bus fares by up to 20%."

A second user of the Blackwall Tunnel told us exclusively "We could expect the same long list of broken promises from Eton educated Tory leader David Cameron. Despite their attempts to distance themselves from Mr Johnson, I do not see why we should trust the Tories. Thousands of Londoners have been hit by Mr Johnson's failures and decisions. They may continue to talk about "Change", but if "Change" is pushing the country back into recession, forcing thousands of people out of work, making it easier for the super wealthy to get even richer and hitting those most in need hardest, then that is the type of change that will be rejected by millions on election day".